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Pathfinding is a specialized way of applying mindfulness.

It helps you mindfully use one question to google your deeper level of mind (or Self) to find your best path forward for any situation, problem, or goal.

The research about the extraordinary power of your non-conscious mind and mindfulness comes from my book STOP!

But PATHFINDING: The New American Mindfulness frees mindfulness from the box.

Mindfulness ≠ Meditation

Pathfinding gives those you want to help a way to use mindfulness on the run, when they need it.

In real time, in real life, for real situations.

And when properly applied, mindfulness can do more than reduce stress.

Using Pathfinding they can ‘google’ their own non-conscious mind to find their personal most fulfilling path forward for any situation.

No daily meditation required.

No practice necessary.

Those you want to help never need to practice because they aren’t the problem.

There are three reasons Life sucks:

1. The way things happen.

     (Let’s be honest. Sometimes there are external conditions you, the ‘Journeyer’, face, that restrict what you can do.)

2. The way our brain happens to be wired from growing up.

     (Your brain, ‘Pilot’, is designed to work for you. One of her/his priorities is your sense of self worth. Depending upon how Pilot happened to get wired, or conditioned to think, s/he may be way oversensitive and see threats everywhere. That’s gonna hurt.


3. The way our brain often disconnects from the guidance provided by their better informed, reality-based non-conscious mind.

     (The non-conscious mind, your Pathfinder, is the part of you that research suggests constantly monitors and gathers data - 11 million bits of data a second - about conditions.

     (Using that information, drawing upon your past experience, and knowing what you need to feel fulfilled in your - relationships, health, finances, work, and interests - it provides your brain with the most fulfilling path forward, moment by moment, no matter what happens, no matter what conditions you face.

     (Unfortunately, when Pilot - your brain - thinks it sees a threat to your self worth, it switches on autopilot - to save energy - instead of connecting to Pathfinder’s - your non-conscious mind - guidance, and defaults to some version of fight, freeze, or flight.

     (You know all to well what they gives you - anger - frustration - a feeling of helplessness - and stress.)

Simple formula:

Your fullfillment =

Pathfinder’s guidance -

Pilot’s interference

All you want to do for any Journeyer is help them coach their brain - Pilot - to remember to reconnect with the guidance of their non-conscious mind - Pathfinder.

Because the more often Pilot reconnects to Pathfinder for guidance:

1. The more fulfillment you will experience in your daily life

2. The more capable you will feel about being able to find fulfillment no matter what happens.

What would that be like, to feel that no matter what happens you will be able to handle it?

That’s what you, as a Pathfinding Peer Coach, are giving to others by teaching them Pathfinding.

Here’s how you do that:


After your friend, the Journeyer, has told you all about how much of a failure she feels, overwhelmed by demands in her personal and work life, you want to help empower her by saying something like these three things:


1. “It’s not you. I know it feels like it’s you who is stressed out (and what you are feeling is real), but it’s not you.

It’s the way your brain happened to get wired as you grew up. That’s why other people you see in similar circumstances don’t feel as stressed out as you do. They’re no better than you, their brain just got wired differently.

2. What if there was a simple mental hack that could help your brain heal?

What if you could use this hack to coach your brain so that, no matter what happens, instead of stressing you out, it automatically looks for the best way to find you a feeling of fulfillment?

3. Would you be curious to see what happens if you tried this hack, Pathfinding, for your specific challenge, right now?

Because, research suggests, supposedly, that at a non-conscious level, we know exactly what to do to level up our fulfillment for any situation, problem, or goal.


And, if your friend is interested, here’s what you guide your friend, the Journeyer, to do:


You open a Pathfinding session by asking the Journeyer to STOP for one moment and ask one question

Step back from the noise.

     (Imagine stepping back from the noise - inside their head, outside in the World - in whatever way makes sense to them.)

Take a deeper breath, and then just let go.

     (Doesn’t have to be a huge breath, just deeper than normal. Then let go of the breath, jaw, shoulders, seat and stomach.

     (They can do this step more than once if needed.)

Observe what Pilot gives you when you ask: “How can we increase fulfillment here?”

     (This question is addressed to Pathfinder by the Journeyer and Pilot.

     (Pilot is conditioned to try to answer this on her/his own based upon her/his conditioned threat assessment thinking.

     (In Pathfinding the Journeyer is coaching Pilot to do nothing here other than wait for, and observe Pathfinder’s guidance.)

Process the first thing that comes up.

     (Because of Pilot’s conditioning, s/he may answer instead of looking for Pathfinder’s guidance.

     (You can’t know what will come up - a fear, a criticism, an urge to do something else.

     (Coach the Journeyer to help Pilot notice the first thing that comes up, without judgment by acknowledging it.

     (The Journeyer acknowledges what comes up by saying to Pilot, “Okay, that came up. What feeling does that thought give you?”

     (If the feeling the thought gives you is uncomfortable in anyway, that’s okay.

     (Every thought has value. Each thought is a step towards Pilot learning to reconnect to Pathfinder’s guidance and find the Journeyer’s most fulfilling path forward.

     (A thought that gives Pilot an uncomfortable feeling is just from Pilot’s old conditioned thinking kicking into place. Instead of taking the neural path to look for Pathfinder’s guidance s/he defaulted to the old neural path.

     (When what comes up gives Pilot an uncomfortable feeling, have the Journeyer say to Pilot, “That’s cool. What else comes up when you ask how can we increase fulfillment here?”

     (‘Negative’ thoughts or feelings are no problem. They are like a rain cloud passing through the sky of your mind.

     (Pilot holding onto them, dwelling on them, is what causes stress. As Pilot’s coach, the Journeyer interrupts Pilot if s/he gets attached to any thought that comes up. ““That’s cool. What else comes up when you ask how can we increase fulfillment here?”

     (And you repeat this process until what comes up gives Pilot a good feeling or until the Journeyer chooses to close the session.)

What might come up from Pathfinder?

Every person is unique, so I don’t know what your Journeyer or you is going to come up with.

It might be an empowering insight, inspiration, intuition, or impulse to take action.

It might be a physical sensation, or some imagery.

Sometimes there is a little bit of a delayed reaction. lt will be like when you try to remember where you left the Discover magazine you were reading, and try as you might, you can't remember.

Then, moments later, as you are walking to the refrigerator to get a drink of cold water - boom - you remember you left the magazine in the bathroom.

Here’s the key:

When what comes up gives Pilot an uncomfortable feeling, continue Pathfinding.

So if what comes up is that you should ask your Uncle for a job and you have been avoiding that because you are embarrassed and feel he would hold that over you -


Those uncomfortable feelings are from Pilot’s conditioned thinking.

Pathfinding will empower you with the inner resources you need to find your most fulfilling path forward.

In this example, it might be an alternate step, or it might be an unexpected sense of calm, confidence that arises, dispelling all anxiety.

We can’t know.

We are not in the business of solving problems for people.

We are in the business of reconnecting their brain to their own problem solver, Pathfinder.


I get that this short summary of how to use Pathfinding may not be enough.  

That’s why I am writing the book.

And even that might not be enough (although with your help, it might be - sign up for the email on this page ).

That’s why I have the online community, The Source.

If you want to be a part of this, hang out with me or whoever shows up at any given time, share Pathfinding experiences, join me at The Source and help me build this online community.

Start anytime.                   Stop anytime.

Are you the person who drops everything to go and help a friend deal with their latest crisis?

Do you sit with them and listen to them when they pour out their heart?

Then you are definitely a “Peer Coach.”

Whether or not you have some sort of “certified” training, you have what it takes to help others.

And I want to help you help others by teaching you to become a Pathfinding Peer Coach.

I’m building a community of Pathfinding Peer Coaches; individuals who are learning how to use a special form of mindfulness to help others.  

You know as a Helper, how important it is to have a place to get some refreshment, support, conversation, and advice for yourself.

This is the place to visit if you are out there in the real world, helping friends who feel overwhelmed by their challenges, even while you are dealing with your own.

I want to keep the cost low so it can be accessible for the most people.

But I have to put some fee structure so that we can sustain and grow the community.

So it’s going to be $8 a month.

And while that doesn’t help me much right now, it should once I have enough folk on board.

You can be a part of helping me build that community by subscribing to my private Facebook group, The Source. This will be where we gather.

Here’s the links that allow you to start anytime and stop anytime:

I am also working on a new book for you:

Copyright 2021 by Peter M Fellows. All Rights Reserved.


The New American Mindfulness

“Maximizing fulfillment in everything you do.”

Text me at: 914 - 275 - 8238

Email me at:

My name is

Peter M Fellows

I am a Mindfulness Pathfinding Coach

I help the Helpers